"My grandfather always said,
'Don't watch your money; watch your health.'

So one day while I was watching my health,
someone stole my money.

It was my grandfather.!"
                                                                  Jackie Mason



Have you ever been this tired?





























On television my 88 year old stepfather and I saw an
attractive woman wearing an evening gown with leg openings
going all the way up to her waist.

"Why do they wear gowns like that?" he asked.

"Maybe that style makes their legs look longer," I speculated.

"No," he said," I think it makes the men look longer."



The little boy greeted his grandmother with a hug and said,
"I'm so happy to see you grandma. Now maybe daddy
will do the trick he has been promising us."

The grandmother was curious.
"What trick is that my dear," she asked.

The little boy replied, "I heard daddy tell mommy that he would
climb the fucking walls if you came to visit us again."

Laura Bush bought "Dubyah" a parrot for his birthday.

She told Dick Cheney, "This bird is so smart!
George has already taught him to
mispronounce over 200 words!"

"Wow, that's pretty impressive," Cheney said.
"But you realize that he just 'says' the words.
He doesn't understand what they mean."

 "That's okay," Laura replied.
"Neither does the parrot."



Bumper stickers

That's OK, I Wasn't Using My Civil Liberties Anyway
 
Let's Fix Democracy in This Country First

(On an infant's shirt): Already smarter than Bush.
 
1/20/09: End of an Error
  
If You Want a Nation Ruled By Religion, Move to Iran
 
Bush. Like a Rock. Only Dumber.
 
You Can't Be Pro-War And Pro-Life At The Same Time
 
If You Can Read This, You're Not Our President
 
Of Course It Hurts: You're Getting Screwed by an Elephant
 
Hey, Bush Supporters: Embarrassed Yet?
 
George Bush: Creating the Terrorists Our Kids Will Have to Fight
 
America: One Nation, Under Surveillance
 
They Call Him "W" So He Can Spell It
 
Which God Do You Kill For?
 
Cheney/Satan '08
 
Jail to the Chief
 
Who Would Jesus Torture?
 
No, Seriously, Why Did We Invade Iraq?
 
Bush: God's Way of Proving Intelligent Design is Full Of Crap
 
So Many Christians, So Few Lions
 
Bad President! No Banana.
 
We Need a President Who's Fluent In At Least One Language
 
We're Making Enemies Faster Than We Can Kill Them
 
Rich Man's War, Poor Man's Blood
 
Is It Vietnam Yet?
 
Bush Doesn't Care About White People, Either
 
Where Are We Going? And Why Are We In This Handbasket?

Impeach Cheney First
 
Dubya, Your Dad Shoulda Pulled Out, Too
 
When Bush Took Office, Gas Was $1.46
 
Already Against the Next War
 
The Republican Party: Our Bridge to the 11th Century
 
What Part of "Bush Lied" Don't You Understand?
 
My Dog Pees On Bushes
 
One Nation Under Clod
 
2004: Embarrassed  2005: Horrified   2006: Terrified

You Elected Him. You Deserve Him.
 
Bush Never Exhaled
 
Nixon Resigned