Lady Lynx

 

 

THE  ULTIMATE  BIKINI
The most expensive piece of diamond apparel ever made
is making its debut in the 2006 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issue.
Designer Susan Rosen worked with Steinmetz Diamonds to create
the ultimate bikini, a special commission in collaboration
with the swimsuit editors.

The bikini is made up of over 150 carats of D Flawless diamonds,
some of the rarest in the world including ....
a 51ct D Flawless Pear Shape,
a 30ct D Flawless Emerald Cut,
a pair of 15ct D Flawless Rounds and
a pair of 8ct D Flawless Pear Shapes.

All of the diamonds are free of inclusions, or nature's birthmarks,
making the sparkle and brilliance unsurpassable.
That, coupled with perfect D colored stones,
which are set in platinum,
makes the bikini truly extraordinary.

The diamond bikini is body jewelry that reflects the eternal love
and beauty of women. 
Not a lot of materials for $30 million.

 

Two West Virginia lawyers hired a secretary from a small town 
in the hills. She was attractive, but it was obvious 
that she knew nothing about city life.

One attorney said to the other,

"Mary is so young and pretty she might be taken advantage of
by some of those fast-talking city guys.
Why don't we teach her what's right and what's wrong?"

"Great idea," said the partner. You teach her what's right."

A husband was in "big" trouble when he forgot his wife's birthday.

His wife told him, "Tomorrow, there better be something in the
driveway for me that goes zero to 200 in 2 seconds flat."

The next morning the wife found a small package in the driveway.

She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.

Funeral arrangements for the husband have been set for Monday...



"The Secret Service arrested a guy for trying to jump the
fence at the White House the other day. Think about this:
They want to build a fence along the Mexican border?
We can't even build a fence around the White House
to keep people from jumping over."
Jay Leno

 

 

 

A juggler, driving to his next performance, is stopped by the police.

"What are those knives doing in your car?" asks the officer.

"I use them in my juggling act," says the juggler.

"Oh yeah?" says the policeman. "Let's see you do it."

So the man starts tossing and juggling the knives.

A blonde guy driving by sees this and says to his wife,
"Wow, am I glad I stopped Drinking.
Look at the test they're making you do now!"





"OLD" IS WHEN..... You don't care where your spouse goes, just as
long as you don't have to go along.

"OLD" IS WHEN..... You are cautioned to slow down by the
doctor instead of by the police.

"OLD" IS WHEN..... "Getting a little action" means I don't need
to take any fiber today.

"OLD" IS WHEN..... "Getting lucky" means you find your car
in the parking lot.

"OLD" IS WHEN..... An "all-nighter" means not getting up to pee!

WE COULD USE THE LIKES OF HIM TODAY

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Ken Lay of Enron fame is now waiting
to be sentenced to prison.  
How would you like to go to prison with a name like
'Ken Lay'?  
You might as well change your name to 'Ben Dover.'
Jay Leno



A nurse walks into a bank.  Preparing to write a check,
she pulls  a  rectal thermometer  out of her purse  and 
 tries to write with it. She looks at the flabbergasted 
teller and, without missing a beat says,

"Well, that's great ..... that's really great.....
Some asshole's got my pen!



What do oral sex and lobster thermidor have in common?
You can't get either at home.



The teacher says, "Let's discuss what your fathers do for a living."

Mary says, "My Dad is a lawyer. He puts bad guys in jail."

Jack says, "My Dad is a doctor. He makes all sick people better."

The teacher says, to Dirty Johnny, "John, what does your Dad do ?"

Johnny says, "My Dad is dead."

She says, "I'm sorry to hear that.
But what did he do before he died?"

Johnny says, "He turned blue and shit on the carpet."

A Jewish man picked up the phone and dialed. When a
voice answered, he asked,

"Mother, how are you?"
 
"I'm Fine."
 
"Sorry, I must have the wrong number."

 

One day, Sadie and Rose are talking about men.
"I have a question for you," says Rose.

"So ask it already," says Sadie.

"OK," says Rose. "If I meet a stranger at a party and
I think that he’s attractive, do you think it’s OK to
ask him straight away whether he's married?"

"No, certainly not," replies Sadie,
"you should wait until morning."

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I'D RATHER HAVE A PRESIDENT WHO SCREWED HIS INTERN 
THAN ONE WHO SCREWED HIS COUNTRY !
IS IT 2008 YET?

"Tune in tomorrow, folks, when another
prominent politician will
bullshit the nation!"

      
  and BRING THEM HOME, 
  NOW . . . ALIVE! 

http://www.thecopymacheen.com

 

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BARNEGAT, NEW JERSEY
On The Jersey Shore